Crazy: It’s what’s for breakfast.
Every. Single. Morning.
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I don’t have time to fold you right now, so stop being a shirt.
Don’t touch his rainbow again. EVER.
Yes, I know you’re not touching the hearts, stars diamonds, clovers or blue moons, but still: GET YOUR HANDS OUT OF YOUR BROTHER’S BREAKFAST.
Please tell me you’re at least wearing underwear.
I hope you’re not planning to try and sneak a snake to school again today.
A dozen and twelve is not a number, and stop calling him a baby.
Get the dragon off the table.
What are some crazy things you had to say to the kids lately?
nice
I said “it’s raining and you left your umbrella in mom’s car so you’re going to have a bad hair day” to my 8-year-old daughter. She wasn’t happy.
Lance recently posted..Here Comes A Regular
At least you warned her. But more importantly: how was YOUR hair??
Oh how I love the first one. LOL!
I folded her ONE TIME like a year ago, and it’s her favorite game. Kid, I don’t like doing to regular laundry, never mind folding children.
My five-year old son has a bad habit of slapping himself across the forehead. I told him last night that if he continues to slap himself he will wind up looking like a caveman. I caught him trying to press his forehead back in this morning.
That is AWESOME!
A few good ones from my recent past…
To my 4yo son, “Please go put shorts on, and stop making your private parts talk to your sister.”
“Boy, please stop eating my butt”.
“No, it’s not a good idea to go commando with jeans”.
Here’s one directed at ME from my little guy – “Mommy, you can’t use that purple crayon. It’s unacceptable.”
Jen Hollywood-Showell recently posted..Ring, Ring, Anybody There?
So, so unacceptable. Obviously.
Said to my 3 year old daughter,”You don’t have nuts; you’re a girl, so stop saying that..it is ugly.” My 9 year old son is fascinated with the word “nuts” in reference to his testicles; I have tried, unsuccessfully, to get him to stop saying it & use a better word or not to reference them at all around other people. Boys…obsessed with their privates! UGH!
See, my daughter is the one who talks about vulvas all the time. Be glad it’s just nuts in your house. Oy.
My favorite was at dinner, not breakfast. I said “Please get your feet out of the pizza.” Nobody thought it was the least bit weird because it NEEDED to be said!
WHY do they put BODY PARTS in the FOOD??? Whyyyyyyyyy?????
I think that strangest thing I had to say at breakfast was to tell my one of my sons to “Stop rubbing the sausage on the table.”
Jen recently posted..It’s My Phone
My daughter used to rub her food on strange things before eating it. So. Gross.
It’s not what I had to say, it’s what I had to do. My almost-14 year old daughter had a 2-ltr bottle of diet coke and was going to drink straight out of the bottle. After repeatedly telling her not to (while she was protesting about how her brother drank straight out of the milk, and that was worse because “we put that on cereal and stuff”), I tried to wrestle it away from her, half laughing and half mad. That’s when she tried to lick me, so I grabbed her tongue with my fingers and pinched until she released the bottle. It ended up being a better workout than I would have gotten at the Y….
Dyanne @ I Want Backsies recently posted..Because I Couldn’t Come Up With 20
You know what mine is – “Yes, if you’re going to put ice cream down your pants, it will be cold.”
Kathy at kissing the frog recently posted..Religious Intolerance in Children
Not at breakfast, but during a playdate: “I’m sorry (your friend)’s mother won’t let her be a witch. You’re just going to have to let her be a fairy and find a way to make it work!”
Lisa @ The Golden Spoons recently posted..To Tweet or not to Tweet???
LOVE this series!!! And the crowd cheered, “MORE MORE MORE!!!”
Me to my 7 year old son: “If you touch my butt one more time today, I will hit you so hard and throw you out of the house in the cold snow NAKED and then Cassidy (my 9 year old daughter, who is hysterical at this point, I mean why not? It’s NOT her…getting in trouble) and I will watch you freeze to DEATH!!!!!!!!!!!”
I love to use a lot of drama and exaggeration to get my anger out…it really is cathartic and the kids think it’s hilarious. Win. Win.
Chris Carter recently posted..Natural Childbirth…
“We don’t drink ketchup”
Said one of my sons at age 6-”Mommy, if your boobs still had milk, we’d never run out of milk for cereal!”