Being a parent means accepting that with every god comes a not-so-good.
It has been six weeks since my 7yo son broke his arm. We’ve waited for the day of his 6-week appointment since that day.
I naively thought it would be an exciting, fun day.
He only has 2 soccer games left this season, and I thought he’d get the A-OK to finally play. Hooray!
I thought I could treat them to Starbucks for the occasion. Delicious!
I thought we’d hang Halloween decorations when we got home. WooHoooo!
I was wrong.
After much rushing, we did (miraculously) make it to the appointment on time!
While we waited in the exam room, my daughter kept farting. She does this at every doctor’s appointment. Poo was imminent. I made her wait. This did not go over well.
The orthopedist was pleased with how well he’s healing, and said he no longer needs to wear his sling. He doesn’t even need physical therapy!
But he can’t play soccer for 6 more weeks. Or do sports in gym.
My 5yo was able to make it to the bathroom in time to poop, without interrupting the appointment!
I had to press my face against the crack in the door of the miniscule bathroom to gasp in oxygen depleted by her Walnut Poo of Destruction. That stench is still clinging to my favorite coat.
They were so good all the way to Starbucks!
My 5yo lost her mind as we were leaving, because she couldn’t have banana chips AND a scone. There was physical removal of a child from the doorway as patrons tried to exit/enter.
I had the Halloween decorations piled and ready to display!
There was so much homework, we plumb ran out of time (Halloween is in 5 days, people).
It seemed like every Good Thing had a Bad attached, which could be enough to make someone want to throw in the towel.
Make a parent skip the Bedtime Story and rush the kisses Goodnight.
But for me, I know.
I know there is much worse. I have lived Much Worse.
I know the downs follow ups, but the ups follow downs.
I know that we’re all trying to get along, three different personalities changing, crashing, being…trying.
I know that I will always spend my days with my fists unclenched because the tips of my fingers hold the sweet feeling of the soft curves of their cheeks as they smile.
My nose holds tight to the individual warm perfume of the spot behind their necks I love to smooch until they laugh.
My stomach swoons like a balloon filled with butterflies from witnessing so many amazing, everyday feats by two little people full of surprises.
I know how good I have it now, how lucky I am to be in a place where I make decisions and get loved anyway.
I know how happy I can be, because I can be myself and everyone who loves me can forgive me when it’s not pretty.
I know how it can change in a heartbreaking second, so I should drink it all in while I can.
So I do.
This week a beloved fellow blogger is facing the unimaginable:
she lost her 11yo daughter in a car crash.
We don’t know what to do for her, but we want to raise funds
to assist in taking care of the practical
while Bridget and her family deal with the impossible.
If you would like to learn more or give either a cash donation or prayer/hope/kind thought, please click here for the WITH LOVE FOR DOTTER fundraiser.
Embrace the puppy dogs and rainbows! Even though the puppy dogs often leave little poo presents every once in a while. Ha.
Thank you for sharing! I was just thinking last night that we need to take time to cherish the good things we *do* have, and remembering to do this in the face of difficulties is even more important. Happy Friday!
When I pray at night, I also think of what I want to thank the Lord for that day. We ask so much, but forget to thank him. Some days it is the little things and I have to actually think hard to remember them. It’s things like my 20 yo son still kissing me good-bye when he goes to work, or my daughters hugs. Gotta remember all the little things to really appreciate the biggies.
I so love this. So perfectly said. And felt. xo
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Thank you for the reminder. In all of the rushes, I need to remember – She’s still only 5.
She will misbehave, but when she’s good – damn. She’s a GREAT Kid.
I need to remember to hug her tight, and kiss her boo-boos. because there will come a time, when I can no longer do either. she’ll be too big, or too cool … or .. well.
<3
Thank you, for reminding me. She's Only Five.
Beautiful post, Kim. It feels good when I have it all in perspective like this. But I lose perspective easily and get bogged down in the bads without appreciating the goods enough. I’ve rushed too many bedtimes, said no to too many requests for another song, and have had whole days where I failed to nuzzle those necks and drown in a sea of giggles and squeals. And then something happens out in the world to someone else. Something that could have happened to me and my kids. And I’m overcome with perspective.
I cannot imagine losing my daughter. She’s 13 and still is – and always will be – my baby. She can drive me up a wall sometimes, but I’d be lost without her. Sending so much love to Dotter’s family and friends.
And hugging my girl extra tight when she gets home from school. And before bed. And always.
We will continue to lose our patience, become frustrated, yell, eventually we’ll all say things to our kids we wish we could take back. But just as bad follows good, our love follows these indiscretions and overpowers them, our kids know our love, our kids feel our devotion to them, our kids know we’re not always perfect, but we’re always the most perfect parent for them.
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This is a lovely post.
It is so easy to get caught up with rushing through the necessities.
It’s great that you are purposely taking time to enjoy you kids.
I know I can always use the reminder to do the same with mine.
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Thank you for sharing. I’m so sorry and heartbroken for your friend. I will make sure to hug my littles extra tight tonight.