I have plans.
And clearly, thousands of other people do, too.
Some of you see all these blog posts, Facebook updates and Tweets about BlogHer12 and are soaking it up.
The rest of you are all For cripes sake…enough of this BlogHer baloney! Where’s the snark/craft/fashion tip/coupon/writing prompt I came here to see? And does paying for a conference pass take over a blogger’s entire brain for the 14 days surrounding a conference? I WANT MY OLD BLOGGERS BACK.
Friends, please allow me to explain why the blogosphere has gone bananas.
Bloggers like to not look like total asshats while blogging.
We are not born with the ability to write html or know how to make our blog pretty or take great photographs with our really confusing Smartphones.
So we buy a conference pass, a train ticket, a hotel room, and rationally plan to go to a conference to learn.
Then we discover that other bloggers we’ve made friendships with around the country, around the world, will be there. Ones we “know”, and ones we stalk in the least-creepy was possible because Oh My God they are so damned good at what they are doing.
The chance to improve our blogging skills while meeting like-minded people is better than getting handed the keys to a Haagen Dazs truck.
However dear friends, please remember that many of us bloggers are much, MUCH more eloquent behind a laptop than we are in person.
Many of us walk around with one foot in our mouth and the other in a pair of shoes we’ve worn since 1998.
Many of us have anxiety issues, fear social situations, spent the last 7 years in the house changing diapers, and/or are painfully shy.
Which means this will likely be a very heavily anxiety-medicationed group of people.
Since we’re bloggers, we deal with it by talking about it online. Searching for control. Reading packing lists, sharing what we’re wearing, looking at what others have worn in the past. Mapping out the route from the parking garage to the hotel to the closest Starbucks and back.
Obsessing. Holy Chiclets on a Stick OBSESSING.
I’m sure there are a handful of totally cool, savvy bloggers out there who are as smooth in person as they are online. Who don’t worry about their appearance or their manner, because they gots it down. Who are great in social situations, quick at taking notes, never get lost in hotels, and have a radar to find people they know in crowds of 4,000+ people.
I’m not one of them. And I’m fairly certain I’ve yet to meet one of them, either.
I’m aware of how little a fish I am in this big sea. I’m aware that I can experience anxiety, too. So I’m quietly doing what I need to do to help me prepare for this trip.
Mostly, I will not worry about making an ass of myself. I’ve made great friends over the years because I am kind of an ass.
And I will carry lots of gum, pens, notebooks and my cell phone charger. These are the most important things in life and when working, so my goal is to only obsess about these 4 things.
(I like manageable goals. Obviously.)
At the last blogging conference I attended, I was shy and reserved and didn’t hand out all my business cards or introduce myself enough. I worried too much about what other people thought of me. Yes, I learned so much and made a few in-person connections to other bloggers. But I could have done better.
So I will do better this time.
At least, that’s the plan.