But if She Tries Anything Funny? We Both Know I Have the Upper Hand (and a box cutter)

Meet Boxy.

"Hi, Boxy!"

One day after school, my 4yo saw an empty box I hadn’t broken down yet, and asked to play with it.

I handed it over, and went back to checking Facebook cleaning the house.

Minutes later, I was introduced to her New Best Friend.

Holy Chicklets on a stick, does this thing give me the Heebie Jeebies.

How Do You Skeeve Me? Let Me Count The Ways...

She carries Boxy around the house so Boxy can watch her cook in her play kitchen, witness the joy of Squinkies in her dollhouse, keep her company on the couch during Megamind.

She crawls inside of Boxy, closes the flaps, then bursts out, re-enacting a dramatic birth scene creepier than anything her Satanic Twin Porcelain dolls (that I exorcised from our home earlier this year) could ever dream up during their Reign of Terror.

This is the toy equivalent to the velvet Jesus painting: No one knows quite what to say about it, and It’s Always Watching You.

iiiiiiii seeeeeeee youuuuuuuuu.....

I tried to distract Miss A with other, less nightmare-inducing toys.

I ended up carrying Boxy upstairs so they can read to Miss A’s dolls in bed together.

I tried to move Boxy closer to the Recycling Bin in a subliminal-message-type manner.

I ended up sitting at the kitchen table having a tea party with Boxy hogging the raspberry danish.

The fact of the matter is: Boxy always prevails.

How do I – a perfectly capable 35yo woman – feel about losing this battle of wits to a cardboard box?

Perfectly fine.

Because this creepy seductive-eyed box makes my little girl Furiously Happy.

It’s not about me.

It’s about her.

She felt a Toy Void and, instead of begging for a trip to Target and some new plastic piece of crap I’ll eventually step on with bare feet at night, she filled the void herself.

I don’t want to give my kids everything they’ve ever wanted.

I want to give them what they need.

(Plus a little more, of course)

I also want to leave a little space for them to fill their own needs when they can.  Figure things out on their own.

Which is exactly what my 4yo daughter did on a day when she wished she had a playdate after school.

She made a friend and fell in love with it her.

So me and Boxy?

We’re alright.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

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  1. debseeman says

    Seems daughters are on our blogging minds. I’m impressed you can co-exist being creeped out and accepting Boxy simply because you daughter loves “her”.

  2. says

    OMG. This is so funny. Boxy, though? Seriously creepy. I think I shall give Z nothing but empty boxes and pop bottles for the holidays…

    You may have started a new trend.

  3. says

    hysterical. i can see it coming with my 2.5 year old. boxy is so creepy in an even creepier-than-that foxy kind of way. i’m not sure i could take it. i already have a thing with mascots, bobble heads, The King from the burger king commercials…some others. i could see boxy being too much for me and a tragic accident befalling her…flood? wind storm? box cutter typhoon?

  4. says

    Perfect timing with this post. My son just finished building an airplane out of the recycling box using a cereal box, two water bottles and an amazon box. Last week it was a robot out of yogurt containers, a salad dressing bottle, some paint chips and assorted cardboard pieces from bedding packages. They’re really cool and I love his imagination — I just don’t know what to do with the collection that’s taking up more and more space in my house.

    • Jeanie says

      I rememeber when my sister and I were little we made an amazing box maze in our basement right after moving to our new house. It even had various cardboard trucks and cars. The most impressive was the semi we constructed. Our mom let us keep it up for weeks and even take the poor dog through all of it :) This makes me wish I had a basement for my kid….

  5. says

    “Holy Chicklets on a stick!”… I effing love this post. You are a way better mama than me. I probably would have made Boxy disappear in the middle of the night and then blamed Daddy and the garbage men. Tip? Get rid of the rest of those stickers so she doesn’t turn anything else into Boxies!! Yikes! What are those from? “Build your own Barbie?” Ick!

  6. Anonymous says

    My 2 youngest girls talked dad into letting them have an empty BBQ grill box, ( I was unaware of it cause I was at the store) well I came to find out ( from the neighbor) that they were sleeping in this box saying they were homeless and had no bed. Needless to say the box had to go

  7. says

    I’m thinking my only child could use a boxy – then maybe she wouldn’t need me to watch her play every. single. thing. Your boxy really does have the bedroom eyes…rrrrrrr….

  8. says

    That thing would creep me out too.

    But I’d let my kid have it for as long as it made them happy.

    For now? My four year old daughter is content to play with rocks.

  9. says

    First thing I thought of was this: http://aqua-teen-hunger-force.wikia.com/wiki/Boxy_Brown
    Second thing I thought of: my own four year old’s new imaginary brother Leo. She only has sisters, so she created her own little brother. See? Filling that void that’s NEVER GETTING FILLED BY ME. It’s not exactly as creepy as Boxy, but last night I did see her holding her hands out in front of her zombie-style and saying, “Look! I’m hugging Leo!” Um. Cool?

  10. says

    Boxy is super creepy, but dang she’s useful. I hesitate to mention the MakeDo kits for boxes where she can add hinges, wheels, and other functional bits to Boxy. Make her like Rosie the robot maid so at least she sweeps up her own danish crumbs.

  11. says

    It is always great when kids use their imaginations to create something new. And yes, it is creepy, but I think you are wonderful for letting Boxy stay.

  12. Becky says

    Kim . . . I’m sorry . . . but U have me absolutely rolling on the floor!!!

    Boxy is ok, kinda creepy, but ok. The Satan Twin Spawns really are creepy. My mother-in-law gave my daughter a baby doll that giggled every time U poke her belly. Well, long story short, my MIL died about 10 years ago, & the baby doll giggles now for no reason at all. Wanna talk creepy?

    Anyways, Thank U! I needed a good laugh (& I am sincere in my apology that it came at your expense).

    • says

      Dude. You still have a doll that your MIL gave your kid MORE THAN 10 YEARS AGO?!?! Are you trying to be nominated for sainthood through martyrdom? Does your kid even still play with dolls? I think it is time for crazy devil doll to find a new home…

      • Becky says

        I haven’t thrown it away because the MIL passed away almost a year after my husband & I got married. My daughter was 2 then. No, she doesn’t play with dolls anymore, but my daughter has asked to keep her because it reminds her of her “Big Mama”. Otherwise, she’d be out the door.

  13. says

    Ahhh…the joy of interrupted work space because our spawn have latched onto to toy and are finally happy….

    Thanks for always making me smile. I nominate you for the Versatile Blogger Award. Cheers

  14. says

    Thanks for the nice comment earlier today. :-) My baboos LURVE containers of any kind, but big boxes make their day. We have created a television screen to do newcasts behind (hee-larious), rocket ships, houses, but no creepy Mona Lisa eyes box friends. Those eyes are freaking me out! We have a similar coconut head and he lives in the closet. Eek.

  15. says

    Please tell me that Boxy doesn’t still live with you… That was a sweet ending, though, about kids entertaining themselves, and one I’ll take to heart the next time I am gifted a tangled, beaded, glue-encrusted, pasta-laced necklace instead of being asked to go to the store to buy an expensive kit that makes tangled, beaded, glue-encrusted necklaces. :)
    hollow tree ventures recently posted..I’m Putting the "Hell" Back in HealthyMy Profile

  16. says

    Those eyes and mouth are pretty scary looking!!! My mother always tells about the big cardboard box that I played with for a long time when I was really little. Long before play kitchens and all that. I had my own “house” made of a box!

  17. says

    OMG the birth reenactment would creep me out!!!! Better than an imaginary friend you can’t see though, and the kid is constantly looking over your shoulder at it saying it is right behind you….. (sigh)

    • says

      The Birth Reenactment is like a fresh new nightmare each time she does it.
      My brother had an imaginary friend when we were kids. He was a tiger who rarely left his room, and wasn’t a nuisance at all. Why can’t she just get one of those??

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