Fresh, cool NYC evening air blew us in.
Foggy words and shadowed bodies pulsed, pulled, pushed.
We moved apart then together towards two common goals:
One we decided on the phone, leading us to this location,
Another I silently debated in my head, in my heart,
That I saw him debating, too.
I watched his back when he stepped away to get our order,
Panic bubbling up my insides, mind racing, hands shaking.
He returned, we clinked, the long sip helped me speak.
Awkward pauses gripped me when I thought about the other decision.
I was lost in comfortable conversation when I didn’t.
Palpable faith warmed the air around us, drew us closer.
Practical doubt pulled me back.
I sipped again, looked up and his green eyes had changed.
He had the look of a man who saw an apparition at night.
He had the look of a man who saw a rare and beautiful flower.
Breath escaped me.
My stomach clenched, my chest squeezed, I felt anxious tears begin their burn.
Trembling, old walls and distrust and a history dug their claws into my mind,
But my heart fought back.
But my body begged.
The gentle hand that had guided me into the bar now eased me dangerously close.
Lips loosened by whiskey, sweetened with soda, honest with hunger.
Sounds faded, faith flowed, a chance taken.
The room stopped and started in a moment.
Laughter, applause, we parted, inches away.
Seeing nothing but each other.
“It might be the time, but it isn’t the place,” came from a humored voice from behind the bar.
We broke out into a blushing laugh, nerves broken, hand in hand, and took a little bow to the crowd cheering for the chance we took.
In “On Writing” Stephen King wrote, “The scariest moment is always just before you start. After that, things can only get better.”
Write a memoir post – first-person and true – inspired by that statement. Word limit is 300.
I was always nervous before a first kiss.
But this one? I somehow knew it would be my last first kiss, which made it all the more nerve-wracking.
I’m just so glad I didn’t end up nervously throwing up on my future husband that night. He probably is, too.